Horseradish.  Neither a horse nor a radish.  Singular and plural.  It’s an unusual beast.

Regardless of those peculiarities, one thing is strikingly clear in our little garden oasis.  Horseradish harvest marks the start of spring.

There are other milestones people might cite as the start of spring.  The actual astronomical spring equinox seems like a good place to start, but that typically passes with little fanfare and potential snow flurries.  Easter?  Passover? I’m sure some people find the gateway to spring littered with egg shells, peeps and matzoh, but that’s a no from me, dawg.

The start of baseball season is a pretty strong offering.  But, kids play baseball all the time now.  How else can you raise the next Bryce Harper?  Fall ball, yearlong travel ball, summer all-stars.  The start and stop of baseball season has been appropriated by an amorphous blob of bats, gloves and overzealous parents living vicariously through 10 year-olds.

That leaves horseradish – sweet, sweet horseradish – as the one true indicator of spring.

It really brings everything to the table.  It’s a root, so everyone will have fun digging in the dirt. Similarly, you have no idea what you’ll dig up, so the suspense is exhilarating.  It’s crazy looking – Medusa meets a parsnip.  And, you never know where the runners will take you (treasure hunt!).

In my experience, it’s not too common in home gardens, so you’ll impress people with your worldly cultivation (chest tap and point to the hipsters).  But, it’s surprisingly easy to make prepared horseradish (food processor + vinegar, watch the fumes), so you can claim all the glory in your culinary exploits.  Also, it makes for a great way to share your bounty with friends and family, because it’s delicious.  Everyone will want some.

Think of all the ways you can use horseradish – cocktail sauce, sauce for roast beef, add it to Bloody Marys, bump the potency on dips and marinades.  The possibilities are endless.  Just make sure you account for the 20% that will still be left in the jar a year later; forgotten in the purgatory that is the back of the fridge.  That will happen.

Perhaps best of all, it’s very easy to grow.  Now is a good time to start.  It will take a year before you harvest (unfortunately, you’ll have to remain in the dark about the start of spring this year).  Just get a piece of horseradish from the local nursery or from a really cool friend who likes to grow cool stuff, and plant it 4-6 inches deep at a 45 degree angle with the crown (where leaves grow) at the top.  Boom, done.

It’s helpful to water occasionally, but other than that, you’ve just set Mother Nature’s alarm clock for next spring.

Word of caution: the horseradish root sends out a lot of runners.  You’ll see it pop up in all kinds of fun places that weren’t where you originally planted it.  So, if that’s a concern, it’s good to plant it in a pot or a confined area of your garden. 

That’s it.  We’ve harvested this year’s crop.  We’ve re-planted pieces for next year.  Spring. Is. Now.